What’s wrong with me? 233 to go…

Gosh, the whole universe is freezing cold. I miss summer. I miss the sunlight and the late nights, the music loud and the Windows down. I miss the flowers in our hair and the Romance in the air. I miss the joy of feeling alive and the need to only survive. I miss it all, It’s true. But mostly, I miss you.

Sorry, I may have just accidentally written the chorus to what will someday become and incredible song, but it had to happen and It’s all so true.

I don’t know how to feel right now. I liked a boy, he made it clear he didn’t like me (at all,) he still was giving me funny signals and now he has a girlfriend. I mean, good for him, but I don’t know how to feel about this. I guess that I don’t truly like him anymore and I haven’t for a while, but It’s still kinda weird. Whatever.

I find that I’m living in a pattern. A patter where I decide that I like a boy, think that he likes me back, find out that he doesn’t like me back, get devastated, move on to someone else who gives me attention. What the heck is wrong with me? I need to get out of this cycle before it kills my soul and my belief in love. There is so much more to life than the opinion of some awkward teenage boy.

But it still makes me sad. I find myself asking this question a lot “what is wrong with me?” Why do I seem so incredibly unlikable? I don’t know.

I miss the Sunshine… I miss it a lot.

Love you!

Abby

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